What if you spent one week in Ancient Rome?

[0:00]What if you spent one week in Ancient Rome? Day one, you arrive in 100 AD carrying your gym membership card. A Roman senator mistakes it for a gladiator license. Before you can explain, you're thrown into the barracks with actual killers. Your protein shake won't save you now. Day two, gladiator training begins. The instructor hands you a wooden sword and shield, you can barely lift either one. A guy named Maximus does 500 push-ups while you're wheezing after 10. This is humiliating. Day three, public bath time. It's not a relaxing spa, it's a naked business meeting with 50 sweaty senators discussing taxes. You try to leave, they think you're rude. You sit there for three hours praying for death. Day four, your first fight in the Colosseum. 80,000 Romans are screaming for blood. Your opponent is 7 ft tall with scars on his scars. You trip over your own sandal and fall flat. The crowd boo. The emperor gives you a thumbs down but spares you out of pity. Day five, you're assigned to clean the lion cages as punishment. The lions look at you like a sad, skinny snack, you move very, very slowly and pray in languages that don't exist yet. Day six, feast time with actual Romans. The food is incredible, but they're eating while lying down and vomiting between courses to eat more, your stomach files a formal complaint. Day seven, you're finally released. The emperor calls you the most entertaining coward in Rome. You return home, cancel your gym membership and never complain about leg day again.