[0:01]Welcome to another episode of Soul Worthy Love, where we explore that love is safe and if it's not safe, it's not love. And today, we also have the pleasure of having Dana, Dana Giroud.
[0:14]who um worked with me to transform her life, and that's why I was very interested in having her with me in these podcasts because she's an empowerment coach for women, like she's amazing, a nutritionist and all these things that you can do.
[0:30]And but at the same time, what I really loved about Dana was the courage she showed, like, like that's, that's why I think you're a good empowerment coach, because I I say often like, I wouldn't hire a coach or a guide to go up Mount Everest who read about it in a in a book. I want someone who's done the work, who knows the track going up and down.
[0:52]So, um today, we want to talk about the dread of being single. Like, like, am I going to be alone for the rest of my life? Like, you can have the dread of going home when, you know, it's not a good relationship, but there's also that famous dread when you're single and you think, ah, nothing has worked so far.
[1:16]Like what's going to happen to me? So you want to talk about that?
[1:21]Yeah, I think I can talk about that a little. Yeah.
[1:25]So, what do you want to share that's going to empower?
[1:29]For for me, uh, it was learning to be with myself. I spent so many years, uh, and then in past relationships, um, expecting the other person to kind of satiate the need that of the gap that was or the the hole that I felt was there from, you know, passing of my mom, my parents separation, you know, different different things I'd experienced.
[2:04]And I didn't even like being alone. And so I was always looking to exterior things to kind of help me not be by myself.
[2:16]So when I became single, as uncomfortable as it was, being with myself and getting to know myself and learning, learning about myself and ways of being and doing deep inner work really helped me to come to terms with being single, choosing to be single because I maybe becoming single again was a choice.
[2:47]And I made a decision that if I was going to be single that I would enjoy it and I would work on being the most uplifted version of myself. Get guidance if I needed it, pour into my spiritual practice and and then do things that lit me up and made me happy and focus on my nutrition, fitness and my wellness.
[3:12]And kind of everything fell into place, but I I chose to shift the dialogue, shift the narrative around being single, and it wasn't something that happened by accident, something I chose.
[3:27]And if I was going to be single, I was going to enjoy being single, and when the right person was going to come around, like I knew that the right person would come when I least expect it if I just worked on being an empowered woman.
[3:45]And that's that's what's helping that's what I see works all the time. That's why I do these soul worthy love segments here on this channel and I have a whole online program called Soul Worthy Love online program where you can learn, you know, how to do this work and get group coaching calls and if you want, you can work with one of my coaches. Like there's so many possibilities, but that's why I'm so glad you're here because I see is like when people, if you dread, if you don't have that connection with your heart and you don't know your worthy of love not only in your head but in your being, then you freak out.
[4:24]And people who freak out do either two things: either they choose to be alone all the time because they don't want to deal with anything, or they're going to be with someone all the time so they can numb themselves. So I see the two extremes happening. And the only way out of that is to create intimacy with yourself.
[4:46]And I mentioned this in a prior episode is that your essence is love.
[4:54]Like, when a baby is born, is a baby worthy of love?
[4:59]Is a toddler in the throws of the terrible twos, still worthy of love?
[5:07]Is a teenager, uh, still worthy of love?
[5:11]At 30, 40, at what point did somebody stop being worthy of love?
[5:18]The only time you stop being worthy of love is when you decide that.
[5:25]So hopefully you're willing to un-decide it.
[5:29]And I can guarantee you from working with thousands of people, I calculated with my coach I've done probably over 126,000 sessions.
[5:39]I've been doing this work since 1989. So I've done it with, you know, a lot of people. So you start to see pattern is that when you know that you're worthy of love, not in your head, but in your being, you can let go of the stories and you can reconnect with that essence of yours.
[6:01]And now it's not an idea. It it's your state of being. This is from that place, you can create an amazing life by creating true intimacy, by listening to yourself.
[6:17]And yeah, most of us, well, we never taught that at school.
[6:23]There's part of me that thinks they don't do that because it's easier to control us when when we're not connected in our heart. It's like, you know, going to be little good little things doing, but you don't have to be, you know, caught in that system. You can actually take the time. It's not a selfish thing. That's the other thing when you were talking, it's not a selfish thing to pay attention to you, to spend that time with you, to heal you.
[6:50]Because think of the people in your life who you like to hang around with.
[6:56]What do they have in common? Like scan your life right now. Who do you like hanging around with?
[7:01]Are they happy people or miserable people? Happy.
[7:06]So if you want to be and you feel it, like, if someone comes into the room sometimes you go, oh, and then your energy just goes down. Like, do you want to be that person that when you get into a family unit or a group of friends and you feel like, hmm, well, you're going to be like this if you don't take the time to heal your heart, to know, not in your head, but in your being that you're worthy of love.
[7:34]And it's just stories because the truth is, you are worthy of love. It's impossible that you do not worthy of love because, you know, at some point in your life, the only reason why you stop being worthy of love is because you had a crush, you know, when you're a teenager and all of a sudden they dumped you, now you created a story. Or mom had the audacity to have another baby.
[7:58]Now, she's not all focused on me. So what and we it is impossible that you go through life. If you're listening to this, I don't have this problem, you're lying to yourself. I can guarantee you all, each and every one of us, we all need to learn to do the subconscious work to find the moment where we created a story that now makes us feel unworthy of love.
[8:21]So, if you're interested in learning how to do these things, um we have plenty of programs I can offer you, but you can start. I have this uh quiz that you can take and it's two minutes. It's free. You download it, and it shows you whether or not you're emotionally available because if you're not emotionally available, that tells us guarantee that you have some subconscious beliefs that now are now holding you back.
[8:49]You did the, the little test. What did you find out?
[8:53]Well, now, now I'm emotionally available and the partner I've chosen, he's also emotionally available. But if I'd done the test when I what, five years ago, uh, four years ago, even three years ago, I would have been, it would have been the opposite. I would have been selecting emotionally unavailable men, and I myself would have either been self-sabotaging relationships if they were good ones, or I myself was emotionally unavailable. I just wasn't, I hadn't transformed enough to attract that emotionally available man.
[9:29]Yeah, and once you change that inside of you, that's the magic. The magic happens is like people say, oh, finding the right relationship is like finding a needle in a haystack. Well, if you know who you are and you love who you are and you're clear on the kind of relationship you have, it's like all of a sudden you have a magnet in the the hey, you go with your magnet and the needle is there because it's all frequency. Like the universe is an amazing playground to teach us how to love.
[9:59]Anything else you want to add?
[10:02]No. I can't think of anything else. Good. So if you uh, if you enjoyed this, uh, episode, please subscribe and share it and, uh, remember that love is safe and if it's not safe, it's not love. Bye for now.
