[0:27]Has it ever occurred to you to drive better next time? No. Okay. All right. What do we have, ah,
[0:41]here. You're joking, right? You're joking? Greg, you're joking. No.
[0:50]Okay. A sack. A sack. You put a sack over their head. Can they at least breathe? Whose idea even was it?
[1:05]You know what? It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. It doesn't. No. It doesn't.
[1:15]Take it off them.
[1:20]Take it off. No, you barbarians. No. No. I met the sack over their head. Did you leave your brain in the car? Huh? Did you? Did you leave it there?
[1:35]Oh, I have to do everything myself. Goodness me, I am so sorry, dear. I did not ask them to put this filthy sack over your head.
[1:51]Okay. Was this your idea, Greg? Hmm? Was it yours?
[1:58]Well, whose was it? Did you just find them with a sack conveniently over their head?
[2:05]Goodness. Okay. I pay you an unbelievable amount of money to do one thing. Capture them without restraints.
[2:22]Capture them without restraints. Without. With. With without. Correct. You captured them with restraints.
[2:45]Now.
[2:49]Do you remember what happens to people who don't know how to follow orders?
[2:57]We ask them to do better next time. And we ask them politely not to put a sack over people's heads.
[3:15]Is that understood?
[3:18]Good. Good. Good. See? That wasn't so hard. Okay, back to you. Oh, darling. Are you okay?
[3:30]Oh, that's right. Yep, I asked them to tape your mouth shut. That I did. Though I had more sinister ideas, I suppose. Let me take those off for you.
[3:41]But before I do, I'll need you to understand three things. Okay? Can you do that for me?
[3:54]I can't understand you. Okay. Number one, no one can hear you.
[4:09]Number two, I am a very busy man, so you should be thankful that I'm even giving you a jiffy of my time.
[4:20]Is that understood?
[4:42]Good. Good. We had our differences and now we've come to a healthy agreement, I would say. Better already.
[4:55]Huh? Feisty, aren't we?
[5:03]Oh. Do you have anything, I don't know, nicer to say to me? You do owe me one, after all.
[5:13]Mm, figures. Ah, yes. I could imagine all the questions running through your head as we speak. Don't worry. Don't worry. You're under my protection. Meaning you only have very few things to worry about, which is an improvement from many things you'd have to worry about under normal circumstances.
[5:35]I must agree though, this is not an ideal meeting space. I apologize for the somewhat aggressive setting. It's all just for appearances, really. A scare tactic, you know?
[5:56]Well, I think it's about time I get you a little up to speed with your situation. Would you like that?
[6:05]Good. But where do I even begin? Decisions, decisions, decisions.
[6:15]Ah, how about we start with you? Hmm? Yes. Let's start with you.
[6:25]How about the fact that I know who you are? That I know exactly why you're here?
[6:36]Nothing? Not even a flinch? I'm impressed. Very impressed.
[6:45]Well, it just so happens that I have a delicious scoop of what you do exactly.
[6:54]Oh, don't play pretend now. There's just no point. You'll only be digging yourself a grave. You know what you are. And so do I. Isn't that right, officer?
[7:13]Uh, what? Uh, nothing? Uh, uh, I, I swear you're, um, what? Um, Okay. Greg. Hand me the papers, please.
[7:32]Thank you. Oh, where are my glasses? Okay. Yes, um.
[7:41]Here, look. Look. It says right here, you're an officer. What do you mean that says teacher?
[7:50]What? No. No, no. No, no, that, that clearly says. Just show me your ID. Yes, give it. Thank you. Mm. Teacher, First grade.
[8:10]Okay. Okay, okay, okay. Okay. Who wrote this?
[8:20]Who wrote this? Hello? Anybody? So then all of this nonsense just appear on the paper? No? No one?
[8:34]You, Greg, really? Again? Greg. Okay. What kind of handwriting is this? I mean, what in the hell is this? How did you write this so poorly? Did you write with the other hand? Or are you just not-handed like at all?
[9:04]Gosh, people. One job. You have one job.
[9:10]Whatever, whatever, whatever, no. No. Stop.
[9:18]Okay. Excuse me. Back to you, teach.
[9:25]Okay. Teacher, officer, librarian, dog trainer. It does not matter one bit.
[9:41]A, oh, it's a funny story, actually.
[9:44]Oh my God, this is way more entertaining now. What matters is only one thing: your employer.
[9:56]Ah, such a beautiful dumfounded look. Yes, your employer. He is the sole reason why you stand, well, kneel, before me.
[10:10]Oh, but Silas, whatever could you mean? I hear you asking. Well, I am glad you asked, dear captive. See, the thing is, your employer is in a bit of a pickle. That is, if you truly are the teacher.
[10:28]Little old Mr. Jeffords, one day, finds himself a bit strapped for cash. So, to make ends meet, he dabbles in an eensy-weensy, no-no substance market. Are we on the same page?
[10:45]Yeah. He dabbles in the no-no substance market, as you normally do.
[10:52]Oh, but he's not the brightest little peddler, not at all. No. He gets caught red-handed.
[11:00]He then finds himself with two options. Option A: go to jail. Not a very good option, I can imagine. Or option B: use their no-no substance connections to ask the mafia-that's us, by the way, hello-for a little bit of protection.
[11:21]Seeing as poor old Mr. Jeffords is alive and free, you could imagine which option he took. For the low, low price of his liver, the mafia afforded him a bit more time to, say, sort things out a little with his run-ins with the law.
[11:41]Oh, but there's one thing you should understand about sticking your nose into our business.
[11:50]You never want to owe us anything. That's just common sense, no? Greg, would you want to owe us anything?
[12:01]Right. Didn't think so. What about you, teacher? Would you want to owe us anything?
[12:08]That's exactly right. You don't. But for Mr. Jeffords, what's done is done.
[12:17]We gave him, uh, six months to, uh, iron out all his creases. And time's always ticking.
[12:28]Six months go by and nothing. We haven't heard a damn thing from Mr. Jeffords. No, we didn't.
[12:40]But we pride ourselves in our patience. Not once did we press him or bother him or threaten him or anything of that sort.
[12:51]Which I guess, in hindsight, he took for a sign of weakness.
[13:00]That maybe we're a pushover. We're not. Clearly. Seeing as you're here.
[13:10]See, we invited ourselves to Mr. and Mrs. Jefford's beautiful home just a few weeks ago. We gave him time, and still nothing.
[13:22]We spent many, many of that cold, hard moola. That green, green cash, to save your friendly neighborhood Mr. Jeffords.
[13:35]But he had nothing to show for. So we did what any reasonable family would do. We threatened him, then his wife, then his home, and eventually, he bent.
[13:49]Take my school. Take all of it, he said. I still see the snot dripping out of his nose. Pathetic. I don't even know what he meant.
[14:04]How do you take a school? Then he clarified. There's this very charming and accomplished teacher that just started working there. First grade, I believe. Now, I still had no idea what he meant by that.
[14:25]So naturally, I drew my pistol. Aimed at right here.
[14:34]What do you mean? I said. You can have him, he said. Now, Mr. Jeffords, for all that he is, sure knows the way to my heart.
[14:47]He knew that my father had been itching for me to have a partner. To have someone run this family so desperately.
[14:57]So much so that my father took the bait. Deal, he said. And with a handshake, your employer just signed you off to me for three months of extra time.
[15:13]Now, boy, does that hurt. Three months. Three months, that is all. That hurts, right? I mean, I would be hurt. Greg, would you be hurt?
[15:23]Actually, don't even answer that. Okay. And there's that. Part of me thinks that you don't believe a single word that I'm saying.
[15:36]Is that right? You don't believe me? Is that so? But I don't see you with any control of your situation.
[15:54]You sure bite. I like it. Funnily enough though, when I captured you, I had no idea that you were the teacher. I thought you were coming in next week.
[16:07]All this time, I thought you were just some lowly undercover police officer trying to make a big name out of themselves by catching a whiff of this whole mafia shebang.
[16:20]But now that I know who you really are, it's fair to say that you're in a more interesting predicament.
[16:30]But whatever could I mean? Good question. Well, luckily, or unluckily for you, I've grown to like you just a little bit.
[16:43]I like that fight you have in you, you know? That fire. It's like you have something to live for. That's fair. You are being held captive, yeah.
[16:57]Well, whatever the case may be, I like it. And I have all the say in the world to whatever I want with you.
[17:10]Would that be okay? Oh, is that a no? Is that a yes? Which is it?
[17:21]You were collateral, and now you are mine. What's so hard to understand? Hmm? What reason do you have? What possible reason do you have to decline?
[17:36]Oh, yapping and yapping and yapping and yadda, yadda, yadda. Truly, truly feisty.
[17:49]How's that? Did that get your attention? Why, yes, I did cuff us together. Very astute observation. Well, you can just call it a sign of commitment, or a reminder that you have no choice.
[18:05]Either is fine. Stay calm. Just for five minutes, okay? Is that so much to ask?
[18:17]Good. Okay. Guys, you can go. That goes for you too, Greg, especially for you, Greg.
[18:28]Yes, go. Leave the car.
[18:44]Quiet. They have a habit of hanging around. Even when you tell them to leave.
[18:57]All right, here's the deal. I know who you are. You're no teacher. You're no lowly police officer. And you're certainly not some ordinary civilian.
[19:12]Mr. Jeffords caught up in some drug ring. Please. You did so well to play along this made-up story of mine. It's honestly scary how good you are at this.
[19:29]But see, you and Mr. Jeffords just so happened to mess with the one family you shouldn't mess with.
[19:37]And now your eensy-weensy operation is falling apart as we speak. Yes, your operation. I know your little game, detective.
[19:51]Oh my gosh. Did you really think you were getting somewhere with this, fiddling around with arts and crafts in the day, doing some undercover work at night?
[20:11]Oh my goodness. You must take me for a fool. I hid a gun. Really?
[20:20]You were collateral, and now you are mine. What's so hard to understand? Hmm? What reason do you have? What possible reason do you have to decline?
[20:36]Oh, yapping and yapping and yapping and yadda, yadda, yadda. Truly, truly feisty.
[20:49]How's that? Did that get your attention? Why, yes, I did cuff us together. Very astute observation. Well, you can just call it a sign of commitment, or a reminder that you have no choice.
[21:05]Either is fine. Stay calm. Just for five minutes, okay? Is that so much to ask?
[21:17]Good. Okay. Guys, you can go. That goes for you too, Greg, especially for you, Greg.
[21:28]Yes, go. Leave the car.
[21:44]Quiet. They have a habit of hanging around. Even when you tell them to leave.
[21:57]All right, here's the deal. I know who you are. You're no teacher. You're no lowly police officer. And you're certainly not some ordinary civilian.
[22:12]Mr. Jeffords caught up in some drug ring. Please. You did so well to play along this made-up story of mine. It's honestly scary how good you are at this.
[22:29]But see, you and Mr. Jeffords just so happened to mess with the one family you shouldn't mess with.
[22:37]And now your eensy-weensy operation is falling apart as we speak. Yes, your operation. I know your little game, detective.
[22:51]Oh my gosh. Did you really think you were getting somewhere with this, fiddling around with arts and crafts in the day, doing some undercover work at night?
[23:11]Oh my goodness. You must take me for a fool. I hid a gun. Really?
[23:20]You were collateral, and now you are mine. What's so hard to understand? Hmm? What reason do you have? What possible reason do you have to decline?
[23:36]Oh, yapping and yapping and yapping and yadda, yadda, yadda. Truly, truly feisty.
[23:49]How's that? Did that get your attention? Why, yes, I did cuff us together. Very astute observation. Well, you can just call it a sign of commitment, or a reminder that you have no choice.
[24:05]Either is fine. Stay calm. Just for five minutes, okay? Is that so much to ask?
[24:17]Good. Okay. Guys, you can go. That goes for you too, Greg, especially for you, Greg.
[24:28]Yes, go. Leave the car.
[24:44]Quiet. They have a habit of hanging around. Even when you tell them to leave.
[24:57]All right, here's the deal. I know who you are. You're no teacher. You're no lowly police officer. And you're certainly not some ordinary civilian.
[25:12]Mr. Jeffords caught up in some drug ring. Please. You did so well to play along this made-up story of mine. It's honestly scary how good you are at this.
[25:29]But see, you and Mr. Jeffords just so happened to mess with the one family you shouldn't mess with.
[25:37]And now your eensy-weensy operation is falling apart as we speak. Yes, your operation. I know your little game, detective.
[25:51]Oh my gosh. Did you really think you were getting somewhere with this, fiddling around with arts and crafts in the day, doing some undercover work at night?
[26:11]Oh my goodness. You must take me for a fool. I hid a gun. Really?
[26:20]You were collateral, and now you are mine. What's so hard to understand? Hmm? What reason do you have? What possible reason do you have to decline?
[26:36]Oh, yapping and yapping and yapping and yadda, yadda, yadda. Truly, truly feisty.
[26:49]How's that? Did that get your attention? Why, yes, I did cuff us together. Very astute observation. Well, you can just call it a sign of commitment, or a reminder that you have no choice.
[27:05]Either is fine. Stay calm. Just for five minutes, okay? Is that so much to ask?
[27:17]Good. Okay. Guys, you can go. That goes for you too, Greg, especially for you, Greg.
[27:28]Yes, go. Leave the car.
[27:44]Quiet. They have a habit of hanging around. Even when you tell them to leave.
[27:57]All right, here's the deal. I know who you are. You're no teacher. You're no lowly police officer. And you're certainly not some ordinary civilian.
[28:12]Mr. Jeffords caught up in some drug ring. Please. You did so well to play along this made-up story of mine. It's honestly scary how good you are at this.
[28:29]But see, you and Mr. Jeffords just so happened to mess with the one family you shouldn't mess with.
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