[0:03]I'm hoooome.
[0:07]Ngh...... .......Right where I left you. You're on a bender again... What is this? Apple pie flavor? ...Wha? How can liquor taste like apple pie? Ugh, right... They were out of my usual one, so I had to take that crap. Oh, you had to. I'm a little curious, though... Mind if I try some? Mmm-m... Don't bother. It sucks...... Wow, it's actually not bad. Ugh... Yeah, nope. Never mind. There's the aftertaste. Yuck. That's how they make one keep drinking it... Hah! Maybe I will.
[0:46]Hehee! So what's the occasion today? ...Mmm? Yesterday it was "my life fucking sucks!". And the day before that it was "my boss fucking sucks!" So what sucks today? My hangover did... Ahh, yes. Better treat it with some more booze, huh? You're such a cliché. Yeah... ...No retort? Nothing? Nah, you got me... Fine, I'll do it for you! Actually, what sucks today, Ashley, is you! Oh my? And what do I suck? Sounds like wishful thinking to me! I wish you'd shut the fuck up, alright. Pfft... No, I think you're pretty funny. Pretty funny? So not that funny. Pretty much... Pretty funny, and pretty pretty. So not even that pretty? Mmm-m... Shut up. You're my Ashley... The most striking thing in the cosmos. Or the most strikeable? Hahah, no! God, you're awful. Pretty awful. Awfully pretty. Aww, shucks. Beer goggles... Mmm... I don't know about that...... Nooo... You're lying. You're lying, you liar.
[1:56]Is this a trick? Huh...? You want something... Yeah. You.
[2:21]Hey, there... Good morning. ...? ...Bet you feel pretty good about yourself, huh? Asshole. Uhh...? Don't think that changed a damn thing. I don't owe you anything. You owe me the world. Urrggh...... Bitch, I just woke up. What are you even talking about?? You stick yourself inside me and that's supposed to fix everything? Oh, great...... Like, ohhh lord! The day has come! Surely this must be an act of God! How profound! How mind-altering! My life is forever changed, for you have slid your junk back and forth in my cunt for a bit! Except, no. Nothing changed at all! Why, yes. I'm well aware it changed nothing... It's a little late for this conversation, don't you think? Yeah, yeah. Hate to break it to you, but the physical act of us getting off together is just that. I see. So you'd do it with anyone? Am I hearing this correctly? No! Did I fucking say that? Well, if it doesn't matter to you... Did I say that either? Then I can't begin to fathom what you are saying. Level with me, Ashley. I'm hung over as shit right now... I'm saying I'm fine without any lovey-dovey crap. Sex isn't the end-all, be-all for me that it seems to be for you. Because I love you way more than that! ...Because nothing says 'love' like tolerating sex. Exactly! I put up with something so disgusting! All for you! But nooooooo! According to you, if I'm not ecstatically slobbering all over your dick at all times, I don't really love you. Okay... How am I in the wrong for wanting you to enjoy the sex we have? In fact, I don't want to do any of this if you find it that repulsive. Oh, yeah. Fuck you. You ungrateful, cock-brained piece of shit! ...Such love right there. IT IS LOVE!!! Everything here! All of this!! This is all for you! ALL OF IT! I put up with all of this out of love for your sorry ass! Don't ever say I never did anything for you! Why are you keeping score?? Heaven forbid you let me hold you once without turning it against me. I let you make a whore out of me! I didn't! What the fuck!??! What the hell is the matter with you? I don't understand! Of course you don't! You're a guy! You're never, ever going to get it! It's not the same for women! Plenty of women enjoy sex, Ashley! But I don't! Alright. Then let's not do it anymore. ARGH! NO!!! I know you want it, so it's fine! Groaaannnn... Well, aww gee! Thank you, beloved. What a saint you are! Suffering through my affections. I am! And you're welcome. Oh yes. You're so much better because you don't enjoy sex like the rest of us whores and mortals! All hail Saint Ashley! Show 'em how it's done, Miss 'I Won't Come' Graves! That does it. I'm done with this conversation. EAT SHIT AND DIE!! I'm sorry I got you off, you harlot! I can do it again, if you'd like. In fact, fucking let me. Please.
[5:21]Nice.
