DON’T Make Her Come in Oral (Big Mistake?) | Alexey Welsh

[0:00]So, you think you need to go down on her, make her come, and then you can have vaginal sex. is the right thing to do. Woman comes first, right? This might be a bad idea, actually. You might actually be making vaginal sex later less pleasurable for her, and it could be way more orgasmic. So there are two reasons for it. First reason, women who orgasm from oral, they fall into two groups. And it's roughly 50/50 between the groups from my data, at least, or working with many women over the years. For the first type of woman, getting an orgasm before penetration through oral, helps her to enjoy vaginal sex later. It relaxes her mind, it makes her more sensitive in the vagina. So for her, this advice works. She climaxes in oral, you move on to penetration, and she enjoys it even more. Of course, that's if she climaxes fairly easily. Don't terrorize her into the orgasm. We don't want to do that. For the other group of women, and remember, it's 50/50, something different happens, which will make her enjoy penetration less later. To explain it fully, bear with me. Before the orgasm, the clitoris becomes all aroused and sensitive. Then you make her come, and some of that arousal and sensitivity drops. It's a little bit similar to when men come, although for men it's really massive. For women, it's not as big, you know, they're not completely done. Uh some are actually, but you know, mostly, yeah, they can go on. But it's like, you know, her arousal was here. It doesn't go completely to the baseline, but it drops to some extent. Here is where this matters. A lot, a lot of women struggle to feel pleasure inside the vagina in penetration. Men often think that women only dream of a dick inside the vagina, but it's often their least favorite part because they often struggle to feel pleasure there the most. Which often doesn't have to be like this as well, uh it's all about how you do sex, but, you know, that's a story not for this video. Now, arousing the clitoris makes the vaginal sex more pleasurable. Why? Because the clit is actually, you know, a really big structure, it's not just the head. So, if this is the head of the clitoris, and this is the vagina, you know, it goes, the clitoris is actually all around the vaginal opening, in the legs of the clitoris. They wrap around the vaginal opening, the part that you're actually moving through with the penis, and some tissues of the clitoris also go inward into the vagina. So when the clitoris is aroused from oral, that whole structure is aroused. And the vagina inside becomes more sensitive. It will feel more pleasure and potentially will be more orgasmic. So, for these women, who do have a drop in sexual energy after the climax on the clitoris, if you give her an orgasm before penetration, you are discharging the clitoris, you are turning down that whole structure that is around the vagina and goes into the vagina. You are dropping sensitivity there right before penetration. You want to leverage that too. What you want to do is you want to stimulate the clitoris to strong pleasure and charge, leave it not discharged, and start intercourse. For this kind of woman, that will usually mean that she will feel more pleasure in sex, and the vagina could potentially even go into orgasmic states. I'm not saying that this is all you need to do to make the vagina orgasmic in intercourse. There is a lot more to how the vaginal orgasmicity works that you need to be able to do. But certainly you are not helping by discharging sexual energy from the vagina right before penetration. So, what about if she doesn't have a problem with penetration, she actually enjoys it a lot, right? You can make the vagina even more supercharged before the intercourse, creating even more potential for that whole vaginal orgasmicity. A lot of women don't know this pattern about themselves because everybody everywhere is saying that, you know, they should just come as often as they want. Nobody's talking about the dynamics of the buildup of sexual energy and the drop in sexual energy via orgasms in women. It's just different to how it is in men, but it does exist. So she might be convinced, like you, that, you know, a woman comes first. And she will have no clue that that's not helping her. I have worked with a good number of women who told me, I don't enjoy penetration much. Then I find out that they do this climax right before penetration, and I'm like, what are you doing? And it really helps when they stop doing that. Also, please don't leave a comment saying that you or your woman don't have this drop in sensitivity after an orgasm. I already said that it's 50/50, you know, good for you. If you don't know which type you are or your partner, I will explain the simple test that you can do at the end of the video. If you guys wouldn't mind liking this, subscribing, that would be great. Now, do not misunderstand me. I am not saying she must never get an orgasm during your sex together. If she can, if she likes it, obviously don't terrorize her into it. You can give her an orgasm with oral and avoid this drop and maximize pleasure in the vaginal sex. You just need to do a little trick here, and I will tell you exactly what to do. But first, second, probably more important reason, why you should stop this routine. And this goes for all women, those who have that effect and those who don't. And by the way, quick mention, only if you feel that you would like further help to equip yourself as a lover. I have a comprehensive program for men built from my two decades of professional experience where I teach you completely how to open a woman sexually to her greatest potential. When you have this intention, I always make sure that she comes first. It puts her under pressure. She has to perform for you. You think it is gentlemanly, but it has become a menace for women. A big proportion of women actually hate oral for this reason and avoid it. You just never know about it because you go down on her, oblivious to it. She doesn't want it, but she doesn't know how to stop it without being, you know, really dramatic. So she just sits through it and hopes that it will be over soon. When she feels that her orgasm is your goal, this pressure shuts down the pleasure in the clitoris. She's not enjoying oral, the orgasm will be far more difficult because of it anyway, and she will be less aroused for penetration later, because she spent all that time before getting stressed instead of getting properly aroused and enjoying herself. You just want to let her enjoy oral as a nice thing without forcing this pressure on her that every time she must come. Sometimes it is just to arouse her. Sometimes it is just to give her some nice sex for a bit via oral. And sometimes, if you just focus on giving her pleasure and build up intelligently, she may naturally come close to an orgasm. Without overt pressure and it may happen, but the main goal always has to be just to let her enjoy oral. I will tell you how to include the orgasm from oral and maximize her pleasure in penetration now. But I have to say this. Men got it in their head that working on her climax and giving it to her is the best sex for her. It is not. A climax is okay, not her greatest sex, it's just a nice addition. If you give her really powerful lovemaking that makes her feel truly amazing and really powerfully enriched, but doesn't bring a climax, for most women, it will be far greater than this goal-oriented work that you do. Plus, as I always say, the climax is not even her, you know, greatest orgasm. You need to understand female orgasmicity completely differently. There is a range of much more fulfilling ongoing orgasmic experiences that most women haven't discovered. However, if both of you want to give her a climax, and this is something you both normally do, but doing it before penetration drops her sexual energy, here is the best way to go about it. After good foreplay, always, you go down on her. You do oral, you arouse the clitoris, you don't make it come, you leave it high. Then you have vaginal sex, she will enjoy it more, you make sure you don't come. At some point you go out and go down on her again. And if she likes orgasms from oral, and they are easy for her, then this is the time that you can do it for her. Once she has an orgasm, you can start penetration again, and that time you can go all the way to the end for yourself, yeah? And actually, this works really beautifully for women when you switch from one thing to another during sex. It only gets her more and more aroused. So you may ask, if I give her an orgasm at this point, will that not drop her arousal for the second vaginal sex, yeah? Maybe a bit, but not nearly as much as if you did it before the first one. Why? Because you already have stimulated her vagina a lot from the inside with the first penetration. It's all hot and vibrant if you did it well, not if you did what men typically do, the kind of monotonous hammering. So then even if you discharge the clitoris in oral, the vagina still stays hot, because the vagina takes a long time to cool down. Now, how do you know which of those two types is your partner, does she drop sexual energy after orgasm or she doesn't? Because most women don't know about it themselves, just run a little test. Have sex one time when you make her come before the intercourse, and then have sex the second time when you don't make her come before the intercourse. And then ask her, how did you feel inside today? Did you feel more this time or the other time? It might take a few goes for her to really reflect and to pay attention and to notice. I hope it's been helpful. Enjoy each other.